Good God, this is serious. Samuel L. Jackson stars in a bold new film: Snakes on a Plane. You heard me.
Plot outline: On board a flight over the Pacific Ocean, an assassin, bent on killing a passenger who’s a witness in protective custody, lets loose a crate full of deadly snakes.
What’s hilarious is that the film was originally pegged with the lifeless title of Flight 121, but Jackson himself lobbied for the current name (and won).
“Snakes on a muthafuckin’ plane!”
Just finished watching Once Upon a Time in the West. Brilliant, moving, and involving from start to finish… and this is coming from a guy who is very picky about Westerns! I could go on and on about the plot and artistic merits but that’s what the Fistful of Leone website is for. In the meantime, dig the picture of Claudia Cardinale, who plays the female lead. God bless the Italians for giving the world such beautiful women! 
Here’s the online trailer for Creep, an intense & disturbing new British/German co-production. One of few good horror movies I’ve seen in the past several years!
Here’s a fascinating article describing the late Stanley Kubrick’s private estate. It’s a rare look into the inner sanctum of a brilliant artist-filmmaker.
Biterwaitress.com collects horror stories from waitresses around the country, and there’s quite a few recollections of celebrity encounters. Discover what a stingy bastard your favorite movie star is… or perhaps what a swell person he/she is.
In 1968, a young director named George Romero set out with a cast of Pittsburgh unknowns to make a low-budget horror film. Borrowing liberally from Richard Matheson’s classic novella “I am Legend”, he crafted a simple story of a disparate group cornered in a farmhouse by an ever-growing army of re-animated corpses hungry for warm flesh. The result, Night of the Living Dead, broke all the established conventions: an African-American hero, a bleak ending, zero romantic interests, sly social commentary, and unflinching scenes of human cannibalism.
Night was a smash hit, encouraging Romero to extend his tale into a fullblown trilogy. Dawn of the Dead upped the ante in 1979 with Technicolor, shopping mall, and a running time of 2 1/2 hours. 1985’s Day of the Dead chronicled the final collapse of civilized society as the undead… showing small glimmers of intellect… claimed their crown as the dominant species.
Romero has often lamented that the scope of Day fell far short of his intended vision, and the recent surge of zombie movies has given him a second chance to realize it in Land of the Dead. The establishing scene is of Romero’s America finally reduced to a barren wasteland. The ghost towns are scoured by a salvage team led by Riley (Simon Baker) with his assistants Cholo (John Leguizamo) and Charlie (Robert Joy). Their assignment is to loot vital supplies for Fiddler’s Green, a walled city under the grip of Kaufman (Dennis Hopper), its Donald Trump-ish ruler. Riley’s looters navigate the countryside using an ingeniously-designed vehicle called “Dead Reckoning,” best described as a Greyhound-sized Sherman tank.
As with any Dead film, there’s signs of tensions amongst the survivors at the outset. Revolution is brewing between the ghetto commoners and the monied class inhabiting the luxurious skyscraper at the city’s center. The idealistic Riley dreams of life beyond the false security of Fiddler’s Green, while Cholo schemes to bribe his way into the stratified society established by Kaufman. When Cholo’s efforts are brutally rebuffed, he hijacks Dead Reckoning, threatening to level Fiddler’s Green unless Kaufman pays him a hefty ransom. Meanwhile, the zombie hordes milling outside the city walls are evolving into an angry mob as intelligent as they are ravenous. Clearly, it’s only a matter of time until dinner is served… and eventually it is, in appropriately gruesome detail.
Any zombie film is only as enjoyable as its special effects, and Romero’s dead have never looked better (or worse, depending on your point of view). Using a combination of old-fashioned latex, CGI, and animatronics, Greg Nicotero’s makeup crew have created perhaps the most repulsive legion of undead imaginable. Regardless, Romero’s sympathies still tend toward his monsters, whose external ugliness and bad table manners pale in comparison to the display put on by his immoral human characters.
For this fourth venture, Romero has assembled a fine cast of genre professionals, all of whom acquit themselves nicely. Hopper is remarkably restrained as the Machiavellian head honcho; there’s clearly a flicker of George Bush in his beady eyes, and his droll quips (”We don’t negotiate with terrorists!”) inspires much of Land’s humor. Asia Argento (daughter of Italian horror maestro Dario) showcases as a kick-ass prostitute who allies herself with the protagonists. Finally, there’s a thoughtful “Mice-and-Men” kinship developed between Baker and Joy (as Riley’s handicapped but unflinchingly loyal sidekick)
Land is weak in a few areas, and this is mainly due to the rushed shooting schedule. If society has collapsed, how can American currency hold any value amongst these characters? Fiddler’s Green is seemingly run by electricity… indeed, a high-voltage fence keeps the flesheaters out… but how is this electricity generated in the first place? Without a doubt, Romero has created a fascinating alternate universe, but the fleeting glimpses we’re offered raise far more questions than answers. It would have been nice to see it examined more closely.
Despite such loose ends, Land of the Dead is one of the more engaging horror films to come down the pike in recent years, and makes a fine bookend to Romero’s original trilogy. Sandwiched inbetween all the gunplay and gore is a barrage of bitchslaps at class warfare, post-9/11 anxiety, and corporate malfeasance. Surprisingly, room is made at the end for yet another sequel , and perhaps Land deserves one. At the risk of bad pun, Romero has proven that his Dead franchise still has plenty of life left in it.
A positive review from Variety Magazine:
George A. Romero shows ‘em how it’s done in “Land of the Dead,” resurrecting his legendary franchise with top-flight visuals, terrific genre smarts and tantalizing layers of implication. Nerve-shredding fourth installment may not fully reclaim the visceral or satirical impact of the writer-director’s 1978 masterpiece “Dawn of the Dead,” but it’s still a satisfyingly splattery feast of guts and ideas. Though Universal isn’t flogging it half as aggressively as last year’s “Dawn” remake, pic should grope its way to killer B.O. with no small help from Romero cultists, whose devotion will be nothing short of zombielike.
The horror maestro has come a long way since the third film in the cycle, 1985’s “Day of the Dead,” and an even longer way since his seminal 1968 classic “Night of the Living Dead.” This time around, Romero is playing with bigger stars and a higher (though still modest) budget of about $15 million, as well as a new shooting location (Toronto, instead of his native Pittsburgh).
That said, “Land” is a tour de force of not only independent filmmaking but independent thinking, rigorously worked out on all craft and technical levels yet enlivened by its twisted engagement with the real world.
Romero’s apocalyptic vision of an earth beset by endlessly self-perpetuating flesh-eaters remains as relevant and resonant as ever, and this time he’s even injected some not-so-subtle political invective into the proceedings. At one point Kaufman, a corrupt, gray-haired city official, declares, “We don’t negotiate with terrorists,” making this the second actioner in recent months, after “Star Wars: Episode III — Revenge of the Sith,” to lob a grenade in the direction of the White House.
The city in question is one of humankind’s last remaining holdouts, an island metropolis surrounded by water and electric fences that keep out the walking undead. Perched in a high tower that dominates the skyline, Kaufman (Dennis Hopper, his brow furrowed with self-entitlement) owns everything and everyone in the exclusive community of Fiddler’s Green, advertised as the place “where life goes on,” and where upper-class citizens are admitted only via waiting list. Those still outside on the streets, meanwhile, are in the early stages of revolution.
Cholo, one of several soldiers sent out on rescue missions to bring back food and supplies, sets things in motion when Kaufman refuses to let him move into Fiddler’s Green. The disgruntled mercenary (a hot-headed John Leguizamo) promptly hijacks Dead Reckoning, an armored military vehicle that holds enough firepower to bomb out the city, which he threatens to do unless Kaufman meets his demands.
In response, Kaufman commissions Cholo’s superior Riley (Simon Baker) to recover the stolen tank, accompanied by sharpshooter sidekick Charlie (Robert Joy) and gold-hearted hooker Slack (Asia Argento, putting a tough-talking spin on a familiar role).
Tension between Riley and Cholo, effectively fleshed out by Baker and especially Leguizamo, reps only one of the story’s intriguing contrasts. Both guys want out of a nightmare situation, but where Riley hopes to start over away from civilization, social-climbing Cholo wants to retreat inside, into the ranks of the city’s elite.
Romero clearly has a lot on his mind, working through issues of class, segregation, individualism and personal responsibility. As always, the scenario eerily and amusingly mirrors the times: Astute viewers will laugh at how the undead phenomenon has already become commercial fodder in the form of theme-park-style attractions and bloodsports. More chillingly, the gleaming facade of Fiddler’s Green implies an entire nation struggling and failing to lead normal lives in a war zone, turning against itself in the process.
Most suggestive of all are the zombies themselves, who have become frighteningly resourceful and smart, having learned to communicate as well as use tools and weapons. Unlike the trendy, fast-moving denizens of the recent “Dawn” redux and “28 Days Later,” Romero’s walkers still shamble along slowly, yet with an increasingly purposeful gait that makes them seem all the more human. They also look more realistically undead than ever, thanks to pic’s ace makeup team (led by Greg Nicotero) and special contact lenses that lend their eyes a bluish, otherworldly glaze.
Pic’s ideas about continual evolution and advancement extend equally to the carnage, which for most auds will be “Land’s” ultimate test. And Romero rises to the occasion with a mastery, discipline and gleeful sense of invention that shows just how far a slim budget can go given the right sensibility. Fans of the trademark spewing, sausage-like intestines will be quite appeased; few will be prepared for the semi-decapitated zombie (emphasis on semi) or the ugly disadvantages of having a pierced navel (you’ve been warned).
Romero has a way of at once honoring and updating modern horror-pic conventions, relying more here on shock cuts (with super-sharp editing by Michael Doherty) and surprise zombie ambushes than the queasy claustrophobia that pervaded “Night” and “Dawn.” The upshot, happily, is a similarly blissful sense of unease.
Miroslaw Baszak’s nuanced lensing, finding endless varieties in a predominantly gray palette, accentuates Arvinder Grewal’s chilly production design at every turn. Reinhold Heil and Johnny Klimek’s score is serviceably grim, with repeated patterns that evoke the restless walk of the damned.
The official Land of the Dead site now has a neat retrospective/tribute to George A. Romero online. Includes interviews with directors Clive Barker, Guillermo Del Toro, John Landis and several fun clips of Dennis Hopper rambling incoherently. There’s even a few interesting on-set moments. Oh, and did I mention Asia Argento? (yum)
For those who don’t get why people would gush over this movie… you first have to possess a certain admiration for intelligent horror films which use subversive political/social subtext. That, and admire Romero for consistently giving Hollywood the finger by making his hits independent of the system. Fans have been waiting two decades for this final installment in his “living dead” saga… and the advance buzz has been overwhelmingly strong. If that makes me a DeadHead… so be it.
Again, this is the summer movie to see, if you have a strong enough stomach.
Now that the Michael Jackson trial is once again at our throats, it might be a good time to pause and reflect on how the jury cut through the mustard so quickly on this matter.
No doubt they were all provided with this helpful guide: A brief HIStory of Michael Jackson’s face.
Brief thoughts on today’s verdict. I do mean brief, too. I really could care less about Michael Jackson. I’ve always despised pop music in general, and I’m probably among the few in the world who won’t tap his feet to “Thriller”, even.
1. Did MJ pull an OJ? In my humble opinion, yes. There are definite similarities. Colorful witnesses? Check. Incompetent prosecutor? Check. Charismatic defense attorney? Check. Celebrity factor? Fuckin’ A. Differences? Precious few. Unlike Lance Ito, the judge in the Jacko trial was balanced and sane, able to keep control of a media circus with relatively few stupid concessions. Unlike the Simpson jury, the ones involved in Jacko’s trial seemed to all have functioning brain stems, plus full ranges of chromosomes.
2. Related to #1, the funniest thing I’ve noticed in the post-trial analysis is the utter lack of race-baiting. OJ’s supporters pounded on the false notion that he was the poor black victim of a high-tech lynching. Even Jesse Jackson, God bless him, hasn’t made this claim about Michael. And honestly, who could make the argument with a straight face? Michael Jackson has the same complexion as Marshmallow Fluff. Like OJ, he hasn’t contributed to the black community in years. You want a genuine champion of Afro-American causes? Jim Brown, baby.
3. I know what you’re all thinking. How can I be so non-chalant about Jacko getting off scot-free, if I do believe him to be a pedophile? I suppose I’m jaded. No one gets outraged when the Catholic Church lets men of the cloth diddle little boys. Heck, the ringleaders get promoted by the Pope to posh seats in Roman basilicas. That said, why should anyone be so upset about a noseless, washed-up pop star who lets monkeys dust his furniture?
4. I’m glad this is over. MJ can go return to his Peter Pan porn shack, and the country can get on with issues that matter. Kudos to the liberals who have resisted the urge to hammer Bush on the Downing Street Minutes last week. The mainstream media would have moonwalked right over it into oblivion.
Here’s a Quicktime clip of Crispin Glover guesting on Letterman, circa 1987. Rumor has it that he was tripping on LSD during the appearance, but others claim he was testing out a character for an upcoming movie.
Personally I think Glover is weird enough to begin with, but he’s obviously more spaced-out than usual here.
It seems the Land of the Dead TV spots are finally getting airtime… I saw two on Scifi and SpikeTV last night. Apparently MTV is running them as well.
Some helpful folks have put all the current advertising spots in one location for easy viewing. Check them out.
Screw Batman… this is going to be the great movie of the summer. If you have no clue as to why this is going to be a must-see, check here for some background.
Universal Studios released two sneak peeks this week:
Clip #1 is a brief exchange of dialogue between Riley (Simon Baker) and Cholo (John Leguizamo). This sequence is from the first 15 minutes or so.
Clip #2 delivers the goods, in my opinion. It prominently displays Dead Reckoning, the urban assault vehicle used by the heroes to repel zombies and raid abandoned cities for supplies. Damn, there’s a lot-o zombies, too… this clip is probably from the final third of the film, where things begin to fall apart for the humans.
Annual cost of being a Star Wars nerd: $500
Cost of two fluorescent tubes and gasoline: $30
Filling the tubes with gasoline, lighting them, and holding a “lightsaber” duel that lands you in the burn unit: PRICELESS.
I guess the Force wasn’t with them.
Wow. Tom Cruise implodes on Oprah. Is this guy on crystal meth? Or is he demonstrating his next big role as a monkey escaped from a meth test lab?
Awesome retrospective on this trash classic here.
Ah yes… Cubans, Chinese, Russians and other assorted Commie bastards will destroy us… but Chuck Norris is here to stop them! Woohoo. I feel safer already. Ironically, Norris prevents more terrorist attacks and wipes out more of their masterminds in 90 minutes than Bush has managed in 6 years. Life sadly doesn’t always imitate art.
Now here’s one of those movies that will never get much airplay post 9-11. In one scene, the terrorists are in America plotting their big strike against the government… one of them blithely remarks:
This was made all the way back in 1985, mind you. The people who made this flick should have been put in charge of Homeland Security, dammit.America has not been invaded by a foreign enemy in nearly 200 years. Look at them, Nikko. Soft. Spineless decadence. They don’t even understand the nature of their own freedom or how we can use it against them. They are their own worst enemy, and they don’t know it.
I’m not one for making fun of disabled people, but it’s Rosie O’Donnell we’re talking about here. Apparently she starred in some new awful Hallmark made-for-TV movie in which she plays a developmentally disabled woman. Kind of like an insane, loud cross between PeeWee Herman and Dustin Hoffman in Rain Man.
The kind folks at TVgasm have created a “greatest hits” Quicktime clip from the show. It will change your life. I know it changed mine.
Oh would I wouldn’t give to see a video clip of this moment:
Apparently angered by a criticism of the book from fellow guest and journalist Martin Monestier, Depardieu launched into a vicious verbal attack, repeatedly calling Monestier “un abruti” (a prat). Monestier responded with good humour, saying, “You’re quite right, it’s good to get things off your chest. You can even use some other words if you like.” Unfortunately, Depardieu was only too happy to take him up on the offer, adding that he was also a “tete de lard” (dickhead) just a few moments later.
Despite attempts by Michel Field, the show’s visibly embarrassed presenter, to restore some order, Depardieu continued to slur his way through an incoherent verbal attack on critics. “I don’t like critics. I like critics when they are right. When they are positive … Or even negative …”
At this point, as if noticing for the first time the presence of fellow guest Mazarine Pingeot, daughter of the former French president Francois Mitterrand, he proceeded to exclaim loudly, “Hello beautiful! I didn’t see you there!” before extravagantly planting a kiss on her cheek.
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